"Build Congruence With Confidence!"

A small conversation about congruence....


Mj IChange: I'm thinking about a word I have come across from many people lately, and it has been used by them without them knowing its specific definition for the context it has been most often used. Let me clarify for you... Congruence = Alignment of identity, beliefs and values, capabilities and behaviour. Being in rapport with oneself


Nicholas Finnegan: My personal definition is having all your resources (on all levels) in line with your desires! All your resources fully working with your desires to bring about the results you want in life in any given situation - smoothness, stream-lined, congruence.

Incongruence is like turbulence on a plane! ;)

It's a powerful word isn't it? One of my favs lol! Bringing all conscious and unconscious resources into alignment :) Don't you just love personal development lol!


Mj IChange: This is why I first found interest Nic, its knowing all the small chunks that make up the whole picture of us as human beings.
I do admire your definition though Nic, although Im not too sure on the turbulence metaphor, care to enlighten me further?


Nicholas Finnegan: Sure! I totally agree with your definition. When I said resources I meant unconscious resources (beliefs, feelings, thoughts, self image etc...) and conscious resources (behaviours, decisions, ideas etc...) all working together to create your desired result.

In other words, if you desire to approach a group of people with the goal in mind to have fun, create rapport, excitement and close. You are congruent by virtue of the fact that your conscious desires and your unconscious resources are working in-line 'together' to produce the outcomes you want.

Congruency 'rapport with oneself' as you called it.

My turbulence statement was a metaphor, meaning that your unconscious and conscious minds are not working congruently, so there's in-congruence, 'turbulence' or argument between what you consciously desire and how your unconscious is responding....

Once these two are Aligned, depending on the situation, you become congruent.

Another example would be wanting to approach a woman but feeling scared. You consciously want to approach, but your unconscious is bringing up anxious signals. That's incongruence.

If you want to approach a woman, and you feel secure, confident and calm (in response to what you consciously desire), you become congruent in your approach....

What you want, is easily accessible by you, in any given situation.

To me that's congruence.

I like your definition, straight to the point. But I'm sure there are many ways to describe it. Wouldn't you agree? :D


Mj IChange: I think we just battoned down the hatches on that one me fellow sea dweller ;)
Thanks for the clarification. :D


Nicholas Finnegan: ey ey mee matey!! All aboard the seven see's yarrrhh lol! Nice one my brother!


In a nutshell: Congruence is when you consciously want to do something and your mind, emotions and beliefs help you to get it. 'In rapport with oneself' Congruency!








To your new life and love,

Nicholas Finnegan
Author of Higher Self Esteem and More...